Complete the behavioral review.
Respond to ten workplace scenarios. Select the behavior you demonstrate most consistently, including when unsupervised.
ACTION REQUIREDThe 2026 employee classification cycle is open.DIRECTIVE OE–2026–041
OFFICE OF ORGANIZATIONAL ECOLOGY
& EMPLOYEE CLASSIFICATION
& EMPLOYEE CLASSIFICATION
Workplace classification is now mandatory.
Complete your assigned assessment to establish your current classification within the organizational ecosystem.
This requirement applies to all personnel, regardless of seniority, reporting structure, or prior assumptions about being a person.
Begin mandatory assessment No employee ID or sign-in required.
Standardized assessment10 behavioral indicators
Individual classification recordIssued upon completion
Private by defaultResponses remain in this browser tab
PROTOCOL
WSCA–04
WSCA–04
01 / COMPLETION PROCEDURE
Assessment and classification.
Please complete the steps in sequence.
Allow classification processing.
Your responses are evaluated for operational patterns, habitat compatibility, and any unresolved geological characteristics.
Retain your classification record.
Review your handling instructions and download your certificate. Employees classified as infrastructure should consult Facilities before relocating.
02 / CLASSIFICATION POLICY
CONTROLLED DOCUMENT · REVISION 04.1Scope and administrative guidance.
Non-animal outcomes are valid.
The framework includes fauna, flora, fungal organisms, and selected fixed assets. A geological outcome does not indicate a processing error.
Existing duties remain in effect.
Reclassification as a plant does not remove existing deliverables. Photosynthesis may supplement, but does not replace, assigned responsibilities.
Disagreement is not an exemption.
You may request reassessment by completing the procedure again. Please note that repeated attempts may result in the same employee.
Explore all 16 classifications +
REFERENCE REGISTER / Classification is assigned through assessment. Browsing the register does not constitute an application for a preferred species.
Before you schedule the meeting.
Find each classification’s communication procedure, preferred working partner, and highest-friction pairing. Shared calendar access does not establish ecological compatibility.
Browse all 16 contact protocolsHow common is your classification?
See anonymous community percentages and our clearly labeled, entirely unofficial starting guesses.
View community resultsYour classification remains unresolved.
Please complete the assessment before making further assumptions about your role in the ecosystem.
Complete your assessmentUntil classified, please remain in your current habitat.
VOLUNTARY PROCUREMENT DEPARTMENT
Free assessment. Optional robot fund.
One helps you understand your workplace behavior. The other gives the creator something deeply unnecessary to supervise.
Find out what species you are.
$0 No procurement approval required.
Ten questions. One suspiciously accurate classification. Your certificate and a new explanation for your calendar behavior.
Take the free assessment No sign-up. No purchase. No surprise invoice from the mushroom.Chip in toward a ridiculous robot.
Small contribution. Unnecessary ambition.
You don’t have to buy the whole robot. Contribute toward an autonomous assistant with absolutely no business being on the payroll. It will join middle management immediately. We expect no measurable improvement.
Completely optional support for the creator. Your assessment and certificate stay free. Payments are handled by the external payment provider, which may request contact and payment information. Contributions are separate from anonymous assessment results.Contributions do not improve your classification. The Office of Organizational Ecology cannot be bribed. The creator’s position is less firmly documented.